Though it's been a while since I finished reading Boundaries, I still have four chapters' worth of notes to recount, starting with this one, which discusses boundaries at work. There's a lot to like in this chapter, at least for this workaholic.
Cloud and Townsend advise the boundary builder that work builds character, but only if done with the whole heart. Taking on a coworker's responsibilities isn't their fault; it's yours. Still, the point that I plan to take most heavily to heart is that another's poor planning is not my emergency (and vice versa).
"Say no to the unimportant, and say no to the inclination to do less than your best. If you are doing your best work or the most important things, you will reach your goals." (208)
Yes, this should be integral to how I approach my To-Smite List. The scripts should be the priority, but thus far, they've been going desperately slowly, thanks to choosing more quick-to-finish tasks like reading and website work. The only problem is that these quick-to-finish tasks are shortly replaced by even more quick-to-finish tasks, so before I know it, months have passed without finishing the first important project I set out to do. It may be beneficial to set aside two hours minimum every day exclusively for script work.
"Limits on good things keeps them good." (209)
I would add that delaying the reward adds anticipation, which makes the final moment all the more delicious.
"Allow[...]critical people to be who they are, but keep yourself separate from them and do not internalize their opinion of you. Make sure you have a more accurate appraisal of yourself, and then disagree internally." (210)
This actually extends far beyond work to friends, family, and even complete strangers. When I get jabbed, I have hitherto failed to fall back upon a group of supportive people and instead internalized the jab, more or less allowing the barb to dig deeper instead of asking for help. As I seek out a new support group this year, things should change dramatically. Also, as I continue to improve my management skills and personal responsibility, many of my critics will disappear.
"Until you face your own feelings, you can't even see who others really are." (211)
Again, this extends beyond the work environment. It has been historically difficult for me to separate the subjective and objective identities of a person. What I mean by this is that I sometimes project my feelings onto someone else, making them the source of my discomfort when, in fact, my own interpretation and the baggage that each interpretation holds, determines how I feel about the situation.
The final good advice of this chapter revolves around finding one's life's work, the pursuit that fulfills and inspires. To find it, one must separate from attachments (influences?) and follow one's own desires. One must take ownership of how one feels, thinks, and what one wants. One must assess one's talents and limitations. I have taken many of these steps offline. I know I want to write. I can create great worlds, but my ability to buckle down and focus on them is limited by my increasing disdain for sitting in front of the computer screen for extended periods of time. As I work on building my financial freedom, my independence from my main attachments should increase. But first, gotta get a steady paycheck.
Cloud and Townsend advise the boundary builder that work builds character, but only if done with the whole heart. Taking on a coworker's responsibilities isn't their fault; it's yours. Still, the point that I plan to take most heavily to heart is that another's poor planning is not my emergency (and vice versa).
"Say no to the unimportant, and say no to the inclination to do less than your best. If you are doing your best work or the most important things, you will reach your goals." (208)
Yes, this should be integral to how I approach my To-Smite List. The scripts should be the priority, but thus far, they've been going desperately slowly, thanks to choosing more quick-to-finish tasks like reading and website work. The only problem is that these quick-to-finish tasks are shortly replaced by even more quick-to-finish tasks, so before I know it, months have passed without finishing the first important project I set out to do. It may be beneficial to set aside two hours minimum every day exclusively for script work.
"Limits on good things keeps them good." (209)
I would add that delaying the reward adds anticipation, which makes the final moment all the more delicious.
"Allow[...]critical people to be who they are, but keep yourself separate from them and do not internalize their opinion of you. Make sure you have a more accurate appraisal of yourself, and then disagree internally." (210)
This actually extends far beyond work to friends, family, and even complete strangers. When I get jabbed, I have hitherto failed to fall back upon a group of supportive people and instead internalized the jab, more or less allowing the barb to dig deeper instead of asking for help. As I seek out a new support group this year, things should change dramatically. Also, as I continue to improve my management skills and personal responsibility, many of my critics will disappear.
"Until you face your own feelings, you can't even see who others really are." (211)
Again, this extends beyond the work environment. It has been historically difficult for me to separate the subjective and objective identities of a person. What I mean by this is that I sometimes project my feelings onto someone else, making them the source of my discomfort when, in fact, my own interpretation and the baggage that each interpretation holds, determines how I feel about the situation.
The final good advice of this chapter revolves around finding one's life's work, the pursuit that fulfills and inspires. To find it, one must separate from attachments (influences?) and follow one's own desires. One must take ownership of how one feels, thinks, and what one wants. One must assess one's talents and limitations. I have taken many of these steps offline. I know I want to write. I can create great worlds, but my ability to buckle down and focus on them is limited by my increasing disdain for sitting in front of the computer screen for extended periods of time. As I work on building my financial freedom, my independence from my main attachments should increase. But first, gotta get a steady paycheck.
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